


The Red String

by Arwen88



Category: Band of Brothers
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, M/M, Sad with a Happy Ending, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-24 15:41:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21960367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arwen88/pseuds/Arwen88
Summary: He had to wrench his gaze away from the sickening sight, from the machine that was probably moments away from killing his soulmate. He would’ve thrown himself under that tank if that meant saving his lover, but he couldn’t do it. He had to take care of his men, and so he forced himself to stop looking, to order his men to retreat, to see that they did what he was screaming at them.
Relationships: Johnny Martin/Bull Randleman
Comments: 6
Kudos: 38
Collections: Loose Lips Sink Ships Prompt Meme





	The Red String

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Muccamukk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Muccamukk/gifts).



> Thanks to Zippit and tanyk for betareading this! <3
> 
> Merry Christmas, Mucca!!!

Johnny had kept Bull in his line of sight for as long as he could but, despite what the intelligence had told their officers, the Germans in Holland were clearly not just kids and old men. Johnny would’ve been mad about it if he weren’t too busy staring at the tank going up in flames and slowly rolling in the same direction the red string tied to Johnny’s finger was pointing at.

He had to wrench his gaze away from the sickening sight, from the machine that was probably moments away from killing his soulmate. He would’ve thrown himself under that tank if that meant saving his lover, but he couldn’t do it. He had to take care of his men, and so he forced himself to stop looking, to order his men to retreat, to see that they did what he was screaming at them.

He threw a desperate glance towards the ditch where Bull was probably hiding - probably wounded since he wasn’t getting away from the flaming tank - until he saw the Krauts come from the other side of it.

It was with despair filling his stomach and weighing down his feet that he sprinted away following the retreat, pushing down his pain and dread of seeing the red string around his finger disappear. Then, he’d know that he had lost the only one that was going to be there for him no matter what.

He sat back in the truck, knowing he couldn’t tell anybody why he was so shaken but at the same time unable to hold back the desperation in his voice as he asked anyone who arrived after him if they had seen Bull.

It was probably unbecoming, but Johnny could feel the tears rise to his eyes and he had to swallow them down, desperately trying to make his hands stop shaking. He turned one way and the other, searching for any sign of Bull’s face or hair suddenly appearing from behind someone else, from behind a truck or a jeep or a tank, whatever could block his sight in the direction his string was still stubbornly pointing at.

When the trucks started moving, rolling down the road and taking him away from his soulmate, the string simply snapped up. Suddenly it was back at pointing towards the sky as it had always done when the two of them were too far apart for the string to point him in the right direction, to the other knot around Bull’s fingers. The moment he lost that little connection to Bull’s, Johnny leaned in and put his face in his hands, barely holding back gagging to the sudden wave of nausea.

Years of training, years since the day they met at Toccoa, his red string not pointing up for the first time in his life only for a tug to shake his hand when Bull entered the NCOs barracks and stared straight at him. It had been years of the two of them talking quietly or hiding from the rest of the boys to be able to share some private talk. Years of trying to prepare for the chance that whether they wanted it or not, they could lose the other at some point.

Now that the moment he had dreaded for so long had arrived, Johnny couldn’t care less about how he looked in front of the others, not when he had lost his soulmate and he could feel all his world crumbling around him.

They knew him and Bull were thick as thieves, the best bros, and so nobody thought it strange his reaction, giving him his space, patting him on the shoulder and saying they would find Bull once they took the area back. 

None of them knew how much more than a friend Bull was to him though.

He knew Bull was alive, he knew by the red string still looped around his fingers, but he also knew that the man was either injured and going to die in that ditch without any of them able to help him out. Or he might wind up in some POW camp.

Johnny didn't even notice the moment he started massaging his finger, his mind running a mile a minute, unraveling scenarios in which he’d never see his lover alive.

Hours trickled by, the company settling in the middle of the fields. Johnny tried not to spend every minute checking the red string attached to his finger. Instead, he tried to keep his mind busy by taking care of his duties and his men.

When he finally could sit down against the boulder though, he had nothing else to do but think.

He could remember his grandmother’s empty gaze the day his grandfather had died. The once energetic woman simply let go of life until she died a month after her soulmate. Johnny could remember her caressing her finger like a tic, like she couldn’t stop herself, until she stopped moving entirely, and he wondered if the same would happen to him.

The night passed in agony. Johnny was unable to rest or even stop the sense of oppression on his chest, the dread and desperation weighing on him until he could only sit on the boulder and run his fingers through his hair trying to hold back the tears.

No matter how much he squinted in the darkness, there was no way he could see where his red string pointed to, or even if it was still there or not.

He almost jumped out of his skin when Bill let himself fall beside him on the hard terrain. They stared at each other, Bill looking worried and pensive under the moonlight, and Johnny’s hair mussed, tear tracks on his otherwise dust dirty cheeks.

Bill didn’t say a word about it, but he slowly reached out with one arm and wrapped it around Johnny’s shoulders, squeezing him against his side.

“Some of the boys went back, looking for Bull. He ain’t dead, man. Nobody wants to believe that.” He squeezed Johnny once more, his voice soothing in the darkness.

Johnny felt the tears rise to his eyes once more and he lifted his face to the sky, trying to push them back, no matter how his shoulders shook.

He felt a wave of gratitude for the boys that were able to do what he couldn’t, stuck there to take care of his platoon, and for Bill now gently petting his head, having the decency to not ask him to explain why he was so wrecked.

When dawn came, Johnny woke up from a fitful slumber only to search frantically for the familiar red string, unable to even breathe before he had verified if it was still there.

He almost let a sob wreck him when he saw the string still there, intangible and yet tightly wrapped around his finger, connecting him to his soulmate, who must still be living.

***

Johnny wished nothing more but to grab Bull and squeeze the soul out of him when the man arrived at their field the morning after riding a jeep together with the boys that had gone to save him. Not that Bull had needed them, apparently, but Johnny only cared about the fact that Bull was back there with them, safe and sound but for a wound on his shoulder.

He couldn’t stop grinning at his soulmate, unable to stop drinking him in, and despite the need to be cautious about what the others could see or notice going on between them, Johnny felt his heart soar every time Bull looked back at him even while greeting the others.

The relief that caught Johnny at Bull’s return was so great that he couldn’t be bothered even by the knowledge that they were in movement right away, going who knew where, hoping not to lose too many others of their company. Everything seemed a little easier, a little brighter, now that he was so close to his soulmate to be able to have the red string connecting them point straight to the other truck, telling him Bull was right there.

If Johnny hovered closer to Bull than usual the next time they dismounted the trucks to settle down for the night, nobody seemed to catch it or care.

“Hey, Johnny…” Bull called him, smiling when he turned to look at him, his voice feeling like a balm to Johnny’s ears after all those hours of dreading being unable to hear it anymore. “Wanna come help me check that barn?” He nodded towards a far off barn.

“Why not?” Johnny grabbed his gun and started in that direction, walking side by side with Bull, checking around for any sign of enemies even if his heart kept beating hard in his chest at the chance to spend a couple minutes alone with his lover.

As soon as they were sure there wasn’t anybody inside the barn, Bull grabbed Johnny’s wrist and squeezed, giving him a little smile full of hope before leading Johnny inside what had been a horse stall to be covered from the sight of anybody else entering.

Johnny followed him more than happily, already shouldering his gun in anticipation for the bear hug Bull enveloped him with as soon as they were pressed together and looking for each other’s mouth.

After all those hours of worrying and fearing, after being separated for so long and the rush of relief at finding each other, being able to kiss felt like a blessing and Bull looked as relieved as Johnny felt at the chance to have his lover in his arms once more.

“Not sweeping you off your feet for a while with my shoulder like this,” Bull whispered over his lips, not letting him go or leaning back either yet.

Johnny shook his head with a smile, drinking in every detail of Bull’s features almost as if he wanted to commit it all to memory once more. He gently kissed the corner of Bull’s mouth before closing his eyes with a sigh, and only then he felt like relaxing fully.

He let his forehead drop to Bull’s good shoulder when his soulmate squeezed him in his arms. “Was worried for you,” he admitted with his face pressed against Bull’s uniform.

“Were you?” Bull whispered against his hair with that soft tone he would use only with him.

Johnny had to nod, not wanting to lie to him even if it might’ve had him look weak.

“God, Johnny, let me kiss you again,” Bull almost begged him, a hint of desperation in his voice that Johnny had never heard before as the man squeezed him harder.

He was only happy to oblige, his heart hammering in his chest as he lifted his head to meet Bull’s lips once more.

He held tight to his soulmate, his whole body wracked by pleasure as he abandoned himself to his lover’s kiss, happy to let Bull kiss him until he couldn’t breathe or think anymore.


End file.
